One dollar! Who will buy us for just one dollar? Down here! One shelf below Timmy the Tooth on VHS. Down. Behind the green press-on nails. Yes! Us! The Goon Shoes!
We'll fit all of your children with these handy straps! We're bouncy! We're fun!
No! No, lady! Don't make your boy put us back. We're not junk! You don't know! You, you middle-aged woman with big feet! Please! Pleeease take us home! Don't leave us here under these big bikini bottoms!
Put down that sweater! Put it down and look at your son sproinging down the aisle of Second Hand Sams in our green and purple majesty. We're made for each other!
Yes? You said yes?! Oh, you won't regret this! I promise!
Watch that first step out of the store, son. We've got bounce but no traction.
Don't fight! You can't all wear us at once. Two shoes. Two feet. That's how it goes. Set the timer. Wait your turn! Wait!
Yes, big brother, we do turn vacuuming into a circus performance. Yes, youngest sister, it is fun to make the springing trip down the hallway. You're tipping! Grab the wall! Yes, little boy, you are taller than your big sister but your turn is up. Pass us on.
One dollar! A day full of giggles and springs and bounces all for one dollar!