Skip to main content

Impossibilities

Come. I've moved aside some selfishness to make a bit of room for You, here in my heart.

Come. Join us at the breakfast table. When I remember You, we'll crack open your Word and search for treasure. When I remember.

I remember until a fork clatters to a stop in front of me and then I forget. YOU DO NOT THROW SILVERWARE! SET THIS TABLE LIKE A LADY! I toss the fork back and it hits a water glass, and water and ice cubes spill out.

The silverware tosser bursts into tears and loud cries, and I hear the words of my heart voice, Your voice, "That's not My way." And it's not. I dry tears and mop water and fill the glass again.

Come, heart dweller. Sit with me on the sofa. Feel the press of a warm, wiggly little boy body. Listen to the story sounds and the giggles and the "Read Move Over Rover again, Mama."

Hear the interruption, "I can't find my spelling book."

And my irritation, "I am tired of looking for your school books! When you are done you need to put them away! I am not your maid!" Hear my voice soften. "I'm sorry, we'll look for the book together."

Come. Come into the bedroom in the late afternoon. Feel the thrashing little boy body . Feel the little heels kicking. Hear the screaming. "I'M NOT TIRED! I...DON'T... NEED...UH...NAP!" See me raise my hand to spank and then set it down gently on chubby legs and stroke and hum instead. Until a book hits me in the face, and then see my hand rise and flash down on a chubby bottom. See big fingers hold little ones until the crying subsides and eyelids close.

How can this be, this waffling that makes up my days?

You live in the recesses of my heart and speak softly, in whispers. Impossible whispers. Forgive seventy times seven. Covet not. Be joyful always. Love your neighbor as yourself. Come. You don't really expect me to obey these impossibilities. Do you?

Impossible, you say. This temper keeping, this love giving, this joyful living. That's why I'm here, for I am the author and overcomer of impossibilities.

And this is why "Relying on God has to begin all over again every day as if nothing yet had been done."~ C.S. Lewis ~

Visit here to see what other's have to say about this quote.


Comments

Melissa said…
Kate,

I can really relate to this. It's so tough to follow Jesus every single minute. I can set my mind on the course, but interruptions make me lose focus & get off track quickly.

As always, thanks for sharing.
ocean mommy said…
Were you in my house this week?

I'm so glad He lets us try again.

steph.
Kathy said…
Kate, thanks again for a vulnerable and insightful essay. We walk with feet of clay and I think of Paul's anguish in Romans 7: I don't do what I want to do, and I do what I don't want to do.... The agony of living in our own skins, in a world of evil, is so very painful. Thanks for sharing.
Denise said…
Awesome post, bless you.
Anonymous said…
You have so beautifully expressed this and brought it into our everyday experiences. Blessings
Aunt Angie said…
Wow, that was like stepping back in time to when my girls were small...You gave that message beautifully.
Bless you!
Amy said…
Breathtaking!

~Amy
Cheryl said…
You have such a unique style of writing that just draws one in! Keep writing!
Miriam Pauline said…
Wow! That sounds like my life. Bless you for sharing.
Meg said…
Great post Kate. I can relate too much! I tagged you for a meme..come to my blog and check it out! Love, Meg
Anonymous said…
Wow. Have I been there! You really nailed the essence of the quote. Every day, sometimes every minute, can seem more than we can handle. Especially when we have handled it before, and it gets old.

Beautifully written!
Christy said…
Wow, I could have written that post (if I was, you know, a good writer and all!).

Really, you expressed that beautifully, and I can relate!
lori said…
ABSOLUTLEY LOVE what you wrote..as a homeschool mom of 3 I laughed at the similarities!!
your words speak volumes!
loved it
Carrien Blue said…
lovely, and honest. You are a good writer.
eph2810 said…
Kate, that is so beautiful - thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on this past week's IOW quote.
Yes, we see the impossible happening with Him reigning in our life.

Be blessed today and always.

Popular posts from this blog

Finding Rest: Part Two (Scroll down three posts to read this story from the beginning)

Why share such a personal story ? I share it because I have talked to enough women to know that underneath the makeup and the matching outfits and the small talk that make up our exteriors, we are a broken people. To pretend otherwise creates isolation. Thoughtful honesty creates closer relationships and greater understanding. When we share the way God works in the difficult things of life it encourages first oneself and then others. For some of us, the pieces have been patched and restored and there is wholeness where there was none before. But some of us are walking wounded, barely hanging on and wondering if there is hope. We have a choice. We can either be completely shattered by bitterness, depression and anger or we can lay the fragments before the One who can take the sharp slivers and jagged pieces and create a beautiful, productive life. Here is the conclusion to John's story. When John was ten, he was sullen and moody and difficult and so was I. But I was no longer proud.

4-H Exhibits-Updated

Update: Blue ribbons all around! 4 of our projects will go onto the state fair. John's headboard exceeds size limitations and so we will lug it home tomorrow. We are relieved. That thing is heavy! ************* For the past few weeks we have been busy sewing, sawing, quilling and painting 4-H projects. The kids have been in 4-H for about a month and they started with a bang. The annual 4-H fair is tomorrow. So this morning we loaded these projects and four kids wearing slippers into the car. The fifth one had sense enough to wear flip-flops. (The other four complained as we pulled out of the driveway that their feet were sweating.) John reclining against the headboard that he built with Stuart. He wrote the 10 Commandments of Table Saw Safety to accompany this project. Claire's quilling project. Lauren modeling the apron that she sewed. Lauren and the dog painting she has been working on in art class for the past few months. Faith and her quilling project. So now

Aviary Amphitheater (Wordless? Wednesday)

We're slow starters in the morning. The children lie on the sofas and read. Charlie sits and eats a graham cracker and a bowl of yogurt at the table before breakfast. Lauren and I take turn cooking oatmeal, or muffins, or scones... We eat somewhere between ten and eleven. Today, in the midst of all this leisure, the house became exceptionally quiet and I went to figure out why because "too quiet" is never a good thing. Except that it was today. I peeked out the living room window into the backyard and found five chairs and five children lined up on the patio. I opened the door and everybody shushed me. "Hush, Mama. We're watching the birds. Come sit with us" Six or seven hummingbirds were zipping around the feeder, frantic to fill their little gas tanks before they migrate. The children were silent, heads tipped up, eyes squinting against the morning light. I went in to get the camera. I took a few pictures of the children but could not capture the hyperacti